In my post about my hard drive crashing, I told the story about how I lost a year’s worth of Quicken transactions and I am no longer able to call up numbers with the press of a button.
Most of you also know that I chose to take a break from doing art festivals in 2009. A very large percentage of my income over the years has come from doing these shows, but on the flip side, most of my expenses (and my debt) are a direct result of my time on the circuit.
With the help of Quicken, I developed a bad habit this year. I found myself checking my “numbers” regularly. Comparing what I made and spent last year to what was happening this year. I believe I was using this information to convince myself that I had made the right decision about the art festivals. Since I have lost most of the transactions from this year I can no longer check those figures.
At first I noticed a little anxiety about this, but gradually I came to the conclusion that I have been spending too much time obsessing about the business side of things and not enough time thinking about my art. I am really embarrassed to admit this.
This realization has given me a lot to think about. Only good can come from this. Whether or not you believe in this sort of thing – I am convinced that losing my “numbers” was not an accident. It was a wakeup call and I am listening.
In a related development, something has gone wrong with my “Google Analytics” so I can no longer check how many people are reading my blog. Again, I think this is probably a good thing and possibly another sign that I need to stop checking, comparing and obsessing and just go take some pictures!
P.S. I wrote most of this yesterday. This morning I was also unable to check my website stats…………….. It’s Halloween – right?